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The Thing, The Way and The Results

 Personal Develpoment, Personal Empowerment  No Responses »
Mar 222011
 
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Cover of "The Science of Mind"

Cover of The Science of Mind

I’m taking a class “Beyond Limits” based on the teachings of Ernest Holmes (The Science of the Mind).  Each week we go over different aspects of Ernest’s teachings and principles of The Science of Mind.  I look at this as time for my personal mind training.

I’ve been interested in “new thought” for sometime now and actually these teachings have been around for hundreds of year.  Louise Hay was once a practitioner in the Church of Religious Science (The Science of Mind)…this is how she got her start.

Take a look at the teachings of Abraham-Hick, Seth, Dr. Michael Beckeith and John Randolph Price…even “The Secret”…they all have roots back to teachings that have been with us for ages.

During our most recent class we discussed the Creation process.  This can be thought of as three stages:

  • The Thing Itself (What it is)
  • The Way it Works
  • The Results (What it does)

This Creation process can be applied to any principle.

Take a look at any of the Natural Laws, i.e. gravity, electricity, mathematics.  These are “the thing itself.”  These are all invisible.  You cannot see gravity, electricity or mathematics.  You do see the results! Lighting is NOT electricity, it is electricity in action.  When you see something fall, you are not seeing gravity; you are seeing gravity in action.

Then there is the way it (the thing) works, this also is invisible.  You don’t see the way addition “works”, yet you do see the result of adding 2+2 that equals 4. You flick a light switch and the light bulb illuminates.

The results are the affect…the “physical”, i.e. the light is on, the plate falls when it’s dropped, the train gets louder as it approaches (the Doppler Affect).

It’s the results we see everyday, not the principle or how it works.

The great thing about Universal Principles is that anyone and everyone can use them…and ‘misuse’ them.  Everyone can and does use the principle of mathematics almost everyday to great success.  However when balancing your check book if you enter 2+2 = 22 this is a “misuse” of the principle.  Your checkbook will not balance and you will not have more money in it.  The principle never fails.

I hope you’re beginning to understand how many of the Universal Principles move and are controlled by us.  WE turn on the switch. WE balance our checkbook.  WE drop the plate. The Principles work through us.

Once we understand HOW the principle works we can use it to our and others benefit.  Again, look at electricity, once we understood it and knew how to control it, we then could benefit from it.

So, where is all this going you ask?

There is a principle that you’ve read about, heard about and even watch about, I’ll call it the Principle of Thought.  It’s been called “Law of Attraction” and law of “Cause and Effect”…it doesn’t matter what we call it.  What is important is that this principle is no different than other Universal Principle.  Once we understand it, know how to control it, we can benefit from it.  Also, like all Universal Principles we can “misuse” it. That is we can think ‘negative’ thoughts and this will create ‘negative’ results.

This is what most of us do everyday.  We misuse this awesome power at our command.  To be fare, this is mainly due to the fact that:

  1. Many don’t understand it
  2. Many don’t know how to control it

Well that what this blog is for, why I’m here and why there are so many other teachers, coaches and individuals educating us on this Principle.

There’s a great passage in “The Science of The Mind” (page 52) that goes:

“Hence, it follows that is you we believe that It will not work It really works by appearing to “not work.”  When we believe that It cannot and will not, then, according to the principle, it DOES NOT.  But when It does not, It still does – only It does according to our belief that It will not.  This is our own punishment through the Law of Cause and Effect.”

Get it…even when we misuse this principle….we’re still using it!

Please print that passage out, read it…contemplate it.  When this sinks in it will turn your thinking around!

Let me add one more thing to this that will really ‘bake your noodle’.  This is a model developed by Dr. William Guillory.  It states:

  • Reality is what we believe to be true
  • What we believe to be true is what we perceive
  • What we perceive is what we expect (what we look for)
  • What we expect (look for) is what we know
  • What we know is what we believe to be true
  • What we believe to be true is reality

Now I dare you…take the passage from page 52 and the above model.  Pick one small area of your life and run it through these two models.  This is going to take inner strength to face it and mental strength to accept it (what you discover).

I promise you….if you develop the mindset of personal growth and contemplate deeply these two principles your life WILL change…you will be able to reach your personal goals and achieve your personal success.

And if you don’t…the principles are still working anyway.

If you just can get your head around this request an Introductory Consolation…I can help you!

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 Posted by Gregg at 7:36 am  Tagged with: , , , , ,

The Fourth Future – Personal Power and Creation

 Personal Develpoment, Personal Empowerment  No Responses »
Mar 152011
 
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This post is inspired by a class I’m taking, “Beyond Limits” at the Center for Spiritual Living here in San Jose.inner strength

This is a 10-week class on possibilities.  I find this information to be in complete congruence and support’s my ideas of mental strength, inner strength and personal power.

We began our class last night discussing our future and the three futures ahead for many individuals.

1st – The Future We Plan For: This involves consciously preparing how we want to life our life.  This can involve where we want to go on vacation, where we want retire.  What we’re going to do this weekend.

The challenge with a “planned” future is that it only comes from the consciousness mind.  There is little, if any, participation from our Higher Consciousness (Higher Self) and subconsciousness mind.  You see, our consciousness mind is the goal setter and our subconsciousness mind is the goal getter.

Without active involvement from both our Higher Consciousness AND our subconsciousness mind we will be making plans based on past experiences as well as current beliefs and values.    What does this mean?  We’re going to keep repeating the past…to some extent or another.

The good thing about the future we plan for is at least there is action.

2nd – The Future We Hope For:  This usually involves no proactive planning or taking action, except for the purchase of a lottery ticket.  Sure, “hope” has been proven to be a positive energy, but when we live only on hope without any plans or action, sooner or latter the energy turns negative.

Simply hoping for a better future, without a follow-through, will lead to unsupportive thoughts, which in turn will lead to a “why bother” attitude.

3rd – The Probable, Almost Certain (Expected) Future: This is where we keep doing the same thing over and over.  We can, with almost with 100% certainty, predict our future.  There’s no clairvoyance here, it simply – keep doing what you’ve always done and you keep getting what you’ve always got.

This type of future is created by ‘unconsciously’ going through life…not aware and not caring to any degree.

Here’s the scary thing….the probable, almost certain future is always at play…unless we consciously and with purpose, created a new future for ourselves and others.  This is the 4th Future…your Vision.

How do we go about consciously and with purpose, created a new future for ourselves and others?  This sounds very much like The Future We Plan For.

First you must decide on exactly what you want. For many, this is easier said then done.  For many they have an idea…a concept of what they want, i.e. a house on a lake, be healthy, a good relationship, no financial worries.

All of these sound pretty good right?

The problem is that they are:

  1. Not specific
  2. Created from the consciousness mind

The first step in creating a new future for yourself and others is to see, feel, hear, taste and smell your future. The only way to do this by connecting and communicating with Higher Consciousness AND your subconsciousness mind.

Remember, your subconsciousness mind is the goal getter.  So what ever beliefs, values, memories and experiences you have stored there will affect your path and your future.  By establishing rapport with your subconsciousness mind you’ll be able to clear away any limiting aspects that are preventing you from living your 4th Future…your Vision.

Once the static and noise have been removed, you’ll now have a clear connection between your consciousness and subconsciousness mind and can communicate with it to get your 4th Future…your Vision.

This Vision is delivered to your subconsciousness mind via your Higher Consciousness.

Is this all starting to make sense now?

Your consciousness mind provides the “What to do” (actions). Your subconsciousness mind provides the “How to do” (your Mission) and your Higher Consciousness provides the “Why to do” (your Vision)

Your consciousness mind communicates with your subconsciousness mind and you subconsciousness communicates with your Higher Consciousness. If you’re operating only from one “mind” (your then out of your mind) or if the communication channels are clogged, you’ll be creating one of the three futures described above.

When you clear the communications channels, establish rapport with your subconsciousness mind and open up to your Higher Consciousness you’ll then be able to create your 4th Future…The Future of Fulfillment…Your Vision!

The 2nd Passages is designed to do just this…remove block, get clarity and develop an action plan for you to create your 4th Future! Contact Me if you’d like more information on The 2nd Passage and how it will change your life….forever!

Please let me know your thoughts in the comment section below.

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 Posted by Gregg at 8:12 am  Tagged with: , , , , ,

Developing Your Mental Strength With Inner Strength

 Mental Strength, Personal Develpoment  No Responses »
Feb 252011
 
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Let’s take a short trip.  Close your eyes…well not now, first read the next paragraph. Close your eyes and remember a inner strengthtime in your life when you felt inspired and excited to make a significant change. What happened? Did you go for it or did your inner obstacles get in the way?

Your beliefs, thoughts and feelings are the foundation on which you build your mental strength, hence your personal success. A solid house can’t built on a foundation of shifting sand, or a compose pile.  The same applies to achieving success by using mental strength.

If your beliefs that lead to your thoughts are shaky, scattered and uncontrolled, they will creates internal obstacles that will hold you back unless you destroy them.

Many times it’s our “good intention” friends, colleagues and family members who plant the seed of doubt by trying to talk you out of changing your path. It is when you decide to make a better life for yourself that your decision will be met by all kinds of warnings and cry’s of “look out!”

People will tell you “That sounds great, but do you have any idea how much that will cost you or how long it’ll take to get the kind of result you want?” Or, “What makes you think YOU can do that?” Or, “Why in the world do you want to change? Just put in your time and be happy.”  Or the big one…”What will happen if . . .?”

Regardless of who and where this “advice come from, they only serve to increase your level of anxiety and self doubts. The best way to handle such opinions is to say what my good friend T. Harv Eker says, “Thanks for sharing” and then immediately forget what they said.

Learning to handle obstacles is the best way to exercise your inner strength, stand your ground and succeed. While listening or running away only serves to undermines your self esteem.

The Universe presents you with these challenges in order for you to learn to how to develop mental strength, grow stronger and more confident in yourself.

To succeed at overcoming obstacles you need to have the mental strength to stick through any adversity, if you truly believe in your personal goals.  You must see things through; to have the mindset to believe more in yourself than in the obstacles and to have the willingness to do what it takes to turn the obstacles around.

This means, you need to stand up to your obstacles and not just believe you can overcome them, but take action AND overcome them! When you attack your obstacles head-on, you’ll find that they will simply evaporate.  Heck, you might even have some fun at the same time.

Standing up to and conquering your obstacles develops the inner strength within you and creates sense of accomplishment that reinforces the sense of your personal power. By developing mental strength habits, you instill into your psyche a strong message of endurance and success. This strengthens the belief in yourself and what you can accomplish.

Sometimes you may have to resort to some other measures to overcome obstacles. Here a few simple yet powerful techniques to assist you in developing mental strength

Contemplation:

Ask yourself if the obstacle can be ignored. Your fixation of the problem only renders it more cumbersome. If possible, stop paying attention to it. Remember, energy flows where attention goes and results show.

Use humor to neutralize obstacle. This helps to diffuse the tension around the issue.

Take the bull by the horn and address the challenge head-on. This might be challenging at first, particularly if you are not used to confrontation. Yet the more you do it, the easier it will become.

Action Steps:

1.See obstacles as a learning to move you forward, fail forward fast!

2. Repeat loudly as often as necessary to yourself: “I have overcome this”, or “This to shall pass.”

3. Confront obstacles as habits of success (and not of failure.)

4. Develop the ability to overcome, bypass, or eliminate obstacles.

5. When difficult circumstances arise, take massive and immediate action.

You can only allow other people to put obstacles in your path, you either accept them or not, it’s totally up to you. Learn how to develop mental strength by standing up to the challenges without complaining. Have the mental strength to change your thoughts and beliefs that you can succeed and you will reach peak personal performance.

If you’d like to find out more about developing mental strength, inner strength and how to step into your personal power and become a better communicator so that you can achieve personal success sooner, pick up a copy of “Develop the Mental Strength of a Warrior” today.

If you’d really like to make fast progress towards realizing your full personal power and potential as well as develop the mindset of confidence, request your Introductory Consultation today!

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 Posted by Gregg at 8:56 am  Tagged with: , , , ,

Personal Success and Communicating – Part II

 Personal Develpoment, Personal Performance  No Responses »
Feb 232011
 
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In “Personal Success and Communicating – Part I“, I discussed giving feedback vs. judgment as well as the “basic’s” of personal growthcommunication.  In yesterday’s post “Resonance Trance Attention For Personal Growth” I discussed the uniqueness of the multiple voices in our heads during a conversation.

Today I’m going to finish up with practical applications of consciousness communication and how it affects your personal success.

Application

Everyday the language you use is a record of who you are and what you are feeling and thinking at that moment.  It is totally and completely about you. If you stop and listen to yourself then the message that you transmitting is totally about your opinions, thoughts and feelings. It is totally about your underlying and unconsciousness beliefs. It is about your judgments, your perceptions and your perspective.

The key in everyday communication is to be aware of this and to take responsibility for your language, your state and the messages you send out. Raise your awareness of the language you use and understand that it is a reflection of you at that moment. Don‘t fall into the trap of telling someone they don‘t understand what you are talking about. Own the message you are transmitting and the response you get.

The second key in everyday communication is to remember that any messages that you receive are about them…the recipient. You do not have to take on the emotion of someone else‘s message. Whatever they say is about their belief or perception.

If you follow these two keys then you will understand that the message is about them, not you and you take it all in stride and not be offended. Instead you will give it the distance you need to be able to see the person behind it and get the meaning of the message that the transmitter intended. If a message comes out in a loud aggressive tone then check in with the transmitter to see how they are feeling. Don‘t make assumptions about the meaning of a message. Check the meaning and emotions back of the actual words.

Communicating across cultures means that language and concepts can have different meanings. It is always important to not react to the message but to check in first for its meaning as intended by the transmitter. This can lead to great personal growth and prevent many misunderstandings.

Being a good communicator is about using you mental strength and recognizing that when a person speaks, the message is about where they are at in that moment in time and the message is being passed through their filters…it’s about them. A good communicator has the inner strength to recognize that their response to a message is about where they are at the moment in time.

If we all lived by this way of communicating, we would decrease the number of misunderstandings in our life. We would also honor the person who is speaking to us by listening to them and getting further clarity to make sure their message is understood.

Contemplation

Allocate one day where you raise your consciousness and awareness around the language you use when you speak. What words do you use over and over again and what do these words tell you about your underlying beliefs, your state and your filters.

Coaching Application

As a coach, one of my tasks is to listen to the message and to feed that message back to my clients. Hearing a message spoken back to the transmitter, my clients, is a great way to raise their awareness of how they communicate and the language they use. It is also a great way for your clients to see their underlying and unconsciousness beliefs.

The language a person uses is also an important indicator of how they feel about themselves. As their coach I often share the language a person uses, and investigate the “meaning” is behind it.  This is like holding a mirror up to them for them to “see” the message they are delivering.

Coaching is all about two people communicating. It is really important that as their coach I am aware of how I am communicating and how my clients interpret the messages I give them. I always check in with them to see what meaning they are taking as this gives me insight into both my way of communicating and how they are interpreting my message. The interpretation of a message is about what a person believes so it can unlock great understanding for the client.

Recently a friend shared a story about a coaching experience. Their client was feeling challenged about caring for themselves. They just didn‘t want to stop and look after themselves. This frightened them and they felt that stopping would reveal too much about how they needed to change their life. So the coach suggested that it was like they were living two lives. The coach referred to their live as like living with a split personality. The client immediately responded angrily saying “Please don‘t refer to split personalities as I have spent many years working for people with this psychological disorder and it is not something to talk about in this way.” The client went on to talk about how difficult the life of a person with a split personality is and how they felt for them and how this use of language in the coaching really irritated them. The coach listened to their client. They didn‘t react to it, they just listened to their client.

As the coaching continued the client spoke about other people in their life that they wanted to defend and care for. After hearing this many times, the coach asked the client why they were able to care for people with split personalities, and other people in their life but not themselves. The client stopped speaking, took a deep breathe and recognized a pattern in their life. They realized that by telling themselves that they were caring for everyone else helped them to justify not stopping to care for themselves. They had even convinced themselves that no one realized that they didn‘t stop to care for themselves. They did this really well. The coach then asked how they hid it. As the conversation unfolded the client again became aware of how they weren‘t hiding it but rather again convincing themselves that they were. They were playing a game of self deception.

This example could have had a completely different outcome if the coach had of been offended by the clients comments about their use of language. However, the coach realized that this message was about the client. The coach didn‘t use the language again and recognized that for this client that example wasn‘t working for them. This was only possible by the coach creating a space for the communication to connect within.

Communicating is a bit like sending a message out into a space. A person then sees the message in that space and responds to it. By doing this, it takes the emotion and the personality out of a message. It gives it enough space for us to be able to ask questions to get clarity around it.

Reflection

  • What type of language do you use in your everyday life?
  • Think of a time when you received a message and took the message personally. What was happening in your life at that time?
  • How does your communication affect your personal success?
  • How can you be more aware of your language in your everyday communication?

I hope you enjoyed this series in communication. If you’d like to find out more about the filters of communication and how to step into your personal power and become a better communicator so that you can achieve personal success sooner, pick up a copy of “Develop the Mental Strength of a Warrior” today.

If you’d really like to make fast progress towards realizing your full personal power and potential as well as develop the mindset of confidence, request your Introductory Consultation today!

I’d like to thank ICA for their inspiration and assistance on this topic.

OK…how do you feel you communicate?  What’s been a recent ‘miscommunication’ situation and how did you resolve it?  Please let me know in the comments below.

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 Posted by Gregg at 5:16 am  Tagged with: , , , , , ,

Mental Strength – The Unfair Advantage

 Athletic Performance  1 Response »
Feb 172011
 
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I always stress condition with my basketball players. I don’t mean physical condition only. You cannot attain and mental strengthmaintain physical condition unless you are morally and mentally conditioned.” —John Wooden, college basketball coach

It’s been about a year since the 2010 Winter Olympic Games and they were simply amazing to watch weren’t they?   I have so much awe and respect for these elite athletes as they sled, ski, jump and skate, with speed, precision and grace.

It’s not just the Olympics; I have this same feeling when I see an amazing catch in the football, or a precise move in dancing or even an “invisible” technique in the martial art of Bujinkan.

In observing these elite-level athletes, their physical and technical prowess is glaringly evident, and their endurance and technical precision is obvious to anyone who watches their performances.

Knowing the physical and technical strengths of elite-level athletes can be an asset to any developing athletes who are working to enhance their skills. But you already know this, don’t you?

This is part of what you do on a consistent basis—you identify the physical and technical skills you need to better develop to improve your performance, then address them in your daily training.

Less obvious, however, are the mental strength skills and mindset characteristics that play a role in the peak performance of elite-level athletes. When watching these athletes, we can’t see what’s going on in their head; their thoughts, focus, confidence, anxiety, attitude and self-talk.  We can see physical and technical characteristics, but we can’t see “what makes them tick.”

Because of this, there is a tendency to only equate performance to observable skills and disregard the other aspects that also impact performance—things like mental training, mindset and mental strength skills.

If we can’t observe these inner strength skills, how do we know they impact performance?  One way is to listen to their interviews after a competition or match.  If you listen very carefully you’ll heard key words that give away their “unfair advantage.”

In addition, over the years, there has been much research that has looked at whether there are psychological characteristics that are correlated with successful personal performances. From this research, we have a better understanding of the psychological skills and characteristics that seem to relate to successful peak performance.

It’s not suggested that having these characteristics causes peak performance, but rather they seem linked to the ensuing performance. Regardless, having an awareness of the skills that relate to enhanced performance can be an asset to you as you strive to improve your own personal performance. Without further ado, let us take a look at these mental training characteristics related to successful athletic performance, as summarized by Krane and Williams (1):

  • High self-confidence
  • Arousal management
  • Feeling “in control”
  • Total concentration
  • Focus on the task at hand
  • Productive perfectionism
  • Positive attitude and thoughts about performance
  • Strong determination and commitment
  • Detailed planning for competition that includes setting goals, imagery and practicing coping skills

Read slowly and repeatedly through the list. Which characteristics describe you? Which characteristics should you work to develop and/or improve? Make use of this research and hone your mental as well as your physical skills.

I’d suggest making an assessment out of these skills and rate yourself from 1 – 11 (11 being the highest/best).   Word of warning from experience….the people that rate themselves at the top (11) in any one aspect usually indicates an unrealistic view of themselves and their performances.

Think about it, if you ranked yourself 11 on any of these traits, where else can you go with it?  Nowhere…you’re saying you’re at the top and there’s nothing more to develop in that area.  Come on man…are you serious?

Everybody has room to improve!

So, take a close look at the traits and rate yourself, better yet, have a teammate or coach rate you (this takes mental strength for sure to put yourself out there) and compare where you think you are and where others perceive you to be.

What ever the lowest score is, work on that.

References

  1. Krane V., and Williams J. Psychological characteristics of peak performance. J. Williams (Ed.), Applied sport psychology: Personal growth to peak performance (pp. 169 – 188),New York, NY: McGraw Hill. 2010.

If you need some assistance in the assessment or developing any the mentioned mental strength aspects, simply request an Introductory Consultation today.

If you’d to get started on developing your “unfair advantage” pick up a copy of “Develop the Mental Strength of a Warrior” today.

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 Posted by Gregg at 5:57 am  Tagged with: , , , , , ,

Personal Success and Communicating – Part I

 Personal Develpoment, Personal Empowerment  No Responses »
Feb 162011
 
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What does it mean to be a good communicator? Does it mean that the message you transmit reaches its mark or personal successintended recipient? Does it mean that the recipient understands the message when they receive it? Communicating is often thought about in terms of the clarity in which a message is transmitted. Yet we are so often part of moments in our day where the message that is transmitted leaves us with uncertainty about its meaning.

In NLP there is presupposition that the states “The meaning of the communication is the response you get.” Our personal success absolutely depends on the communication being  received and responded to the way we intended.

Consider this situation. A consultant is called in to resolve a conflict between two employees. The employees sit side by side in the office they work together in. At some stage between these two people, some communication transmitted was not received very well. Someone said something the other person didn‘t like. They felt hurt and thus the break down of their relationship began. When the consultant was called in, the “problem” was identified as two people who have personality clashes and who can‘t communicate. The consultant was told that the communication between these two people had now resorted to email only, even though they physically sit side by side. They never speak to each other, they just email.

Sound familiar?

Now for some of us we might find this hard to believe but it happens more often than perhaps we realize. Something is said, it is interpreted and then a response follows…or perhaps a ‘reaction’.  You know the difference between and response and a reaction don’t you?  About 10 seconds :-)

Let‘s deconstruct this process of communication. Let‘s take the transmitter. Their world looks a particular way through their eyes. They use language to reflect the way they see their world. This language is their language expressed with their emotions. This language is expressed based on where they are at in their life at that precise moment in time. Their message travels to the recipient. The recipient has a different world, different language, and different emotions. As the message is being sent, it depends entirely on its meaning as to how the recipient chooses to understand it.

The differences in perception are based on each individual’s “filters”, i.e. beliefs, values, meta-programs, experiences, etc.   When we are not aware or unconsciousness of these filters we basically give away our personal power to the other person, at least during the communication.

Let‘s look at another example. One day Thomas is feeling tired and over worked. He is not feeling particularly fantastic about himself and is a little vulnerable. However no one in Thomas‘s world knows this except Thomas. Thomas goes to work and sits beside Alex. Alex has just found out that his best friend has been hurt in a car accident. He is really upset and finding it hard to concentrate on his work. It is at this point in time the Thomas communicates or transmits a message to Alex. Thomas asks Alex for a report that he needs with a tone in his voice that reflects his tiredness. He sounds impatient when asking for the report. Alex hears this impatience and cannot believe that Thomas is asking him for something in that way especially as he is worrying about his friend. He feels that the request with that tone sounds like he hasn‘t been working hard.

You can nearly see the explosion of fireworks between these two people. It‘s a bit like watching two missiles charging towards each other ready to hit…both have lost their personal power.

Both Alex and Thomas don‘t know how the other person is feeling. Their own needs override what is going on outside of them, in their environment. If neither person has the inner strength and takes the time to check in with each other, to get clarity around the tone of the message or how it was received, then this moment grows. The next message is built on the first message. A judgment (a mind read) is made now that clouds each message. A perception of each communicator is made. It stays with them and grows daily until they have each created a complete profile of the other person. They view the other person through this profile that they alone have created.

The only way to change the profile or communication occurring between these two people is for one of them to have the mindset to want to change it. Otherwise it will never change. The desire to improve their workplace environment must be so great that it forces them to look for ways to improve a situation. Some people will never use their mental strength to look for a solution, because in looking for a solution we have to look at both perspectives and understand what has occurred. It means looking at the role we play in this communication/relationship…taking personal responsibility. For some this is too threatening and they choose to leave the workplace instead. However their way of communicating goes with them. They will come across this again where ever they work.

This scenario is not about two people who have personality clashes, as they don‘t even know each other that well or where each other is at. This is not about people who can‘t communicate. They are both able to use language. This scenario is about two people who do not understand that when someone speaks, the message is about where the speaker is at. When someone hears a message, the recipient, the way in which they hear it depends on where they are at.

So let‘s go back and deconstruct this process of communication. If we always recognize that a message is based on the transmitter‘s world, judgments, perceptions, etc, then we will check in to ask questions about that world to get clarity about the message. We will also make sure that both the transmitter and the recipient understand the meaning of a message. As an example, let‘s look at the following message. “I meditate every day” says Thomas. Alex says, “Well done this is fantastic.” Or he may respond with, “What do you do to meditate or what do you mean by meditate everyday?” Thomas says, “I stop in the middle of my day and think about all the tasks I still need to do and list them.” This short moment of communication has now clarified what meditation means to Thomas and Alex understands this meaning now too. Alex may have had a completely different understanding of meditation. For Alex it may have meant sitting quietly in a space and following his rhythm of breathing for 15 minutes.

Let‘s take another example. You are watching the television and a reporter states that a leading company has just announced that over the next three years, interest rates are going to increase by 25%. Your immediate response may be to panic and think about what this means given you have a mortgage or you might think first about this transmitter of this message. You might ask yourself who is the leading company and in what are they leading? What is the context in which this message is being made? Until you get clarity on the message then it is best not to make assumptions about it.

We are constantly communicating, i.e. our body language, the words we speak, the way, then tone and the tremble in which we say them and now a days, we communicate more via e-mail, IM, Twitter and other social media.  To communicate effectively we need to use a mindset of excellence and take into consideration not just what we say when we communicate, but how and with what medium as we using….this ‘pause’ in consideration will take some mental strength at first, and when you become a proficient communicator because of it you will experience personal growth.

Nest week I’ll continue with some applications and deeper understanding of communicating.

If you’d like to find out more about the filters of communication and how to step into your personal power and become a better communicator so that you can achieve personal success sooner, pick up a copy of “Develop the Mental Strength of a Warrior” today.

If you’d really like to make fast progress towards realizing your full personal power and potential as well as develop the mindset of confidence, request your Introductory Consultation today!

I’d like to thank ICA for their inspiration and assistance on this topic.

OK…how do you feel you communicate?  What’s been a recent ‘miscommunication’ situation and how did you resolve it?  Please let me know in the comments below.

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